Age is sneaking up on us and for some of us its sneaking quite fast. Age is not always the kindest thing to our looks and to our body or minds. Facing we are not that young 20 to 30 something person we used to be is not so bad until we look in the mirror or try to do something physically challenging. For my self its more the mirror than the rest but the physical is starting to show its head too.
Age is making me more nostalgic and creates a sort of retro minded mentality in me at times. Many of hours I ponder on the names and faces of people I had known through out my life wondering if any of them think of me or are even still alive. I also wonder about my relatives that I have lost touch with and I think about how my family has been scattered by life’s ever changing circumstances.
I guess it all boils down to my deepest fears which are being abandoned / left behind and being alone. I always needed family and friends to feel secure and happy, though I have had my time alone in life and did quite well too. Either way I know that I will survive but still I prefer a family atmosphere and to have friends. In that respect I am pretty much like the majority of people in the world except for those few who are solitary creatures or hermits.
Those fears drive me to long for the family that is at the moment distant from each other both in relative space and in their hearts. Their lives keep them so wrapped up in the daily routine they unintentionally forget about each other or at least they forget to remember. Even I allow the daily grind of work and home life to keep me from keeping in contact with my mother and brother like I should. I at least do call them once a month or so to see how they are doing.
Well my new philosophy is, if I avoid mirrors and cameras then growing old is not all that bad. LOL
Well I bored you folks long enough.
May truth be the jewel you seek and let peace be the path you walk to find it.
Raymond J. Barbier
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